Here’s something you wouldn’t know if you don’t do modern history:
Well once there was this country called Germany, and they were heaps angry at another country that lived next door, called France. Germany was angry for a whole lot of reasons, and France was angry right back at them. And they decided to go to war. But France had this friend country called Russia who lived on the other side of Germany, so Germany was like:
“uh oh. They’re going to attack me from both sides.”
But then Germany remembered this guy who used to live in his house called Mr Schlieffen, who was really good at planning war. Years and years ago, Mr Schlieffen had made a “Let’s attack France and Russia plan” and named it “the Schlieffen plan” so that Germany could win all it’s future wars. He thought that at the start of a war, a little bit of Germany would keep Russia busy fighting, while the rest of Germany snuck into France through the back gate, killing everyone in Belgium’s granny flat (In France’s back yard) and then they would run all the way to Paris and kill everyone, and then run quickly to the other side to kill everyone in Russia.
Well, so Germany thought:
“Hey, that’s a good idea, and it might just still work.”
but then they screwed it up and forgot to go to Paris the right way. And then the French people were like
“Go away and stop killing us or we’ll kill you back.” And so the French were killing people too.
And then, man, this country across the road called England was like:
“We wanna kill Germany too!”
And then Germany was like:
“Woah! Looks like we’re gonna have to fight a bit harder.”
And then Russia was like:
“Well how bout we attack Germany from somewhere where they don’t expect?”
And Germany was like:
“Oh no, I have to kill too many people at once.”
And then they killed lots of people. And then they got killed lots.
And then something else happened and Germany lost World War One.
Oh yeah, America joined in too, and Germany ran out of food, and British people worked out how to use guns.